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爆笑小學(xué)生英語笑話
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爆笑小學(xué)生英語笑話篇一：一次物理考試
Once in a physics examination, Nick finished the first question very soon, while his classmates were thinking it hard.
The question was: When it thunders why do we see the lighting first, then hear the thunderrolls?
Nick's answer: Because our eyes are before ears.
在一次物理考試時，當(dāng)同學(xué)們都還在苦思冥想時，尼克很快就答好了第一個問題。
這個問題是：為什么在打雷時，我們總是先看到閃電后聽到雷聲?
尼克的回答是：因為眼睛在前，耳朵在后。
爆笑小學(xué)生英語笑話篇二：How to be like a gentleman
Dick was seven years old, and his sister, Catherine, was five. One day their mother took them to their aunt's house to play while she went to the big city to buy some new clothes.
The children played for an hour, and then at half past four their aunt took Dick into the kitchen. She gave him a nice cake and a knife and said to him, "Now here's a knife, Dick. Cut this cake in half and give one of the pieces to your sister, but remember to do it like a gentleman."
"Like a gentleman?" Dick asked. "How do gentlemen do it?"
"They always give the bigger piece to the other person." answered his aunt at once.
"Oh" said Dick. He thought about this for a few seconds. Then he took the cake to his sister and said to her,"Cut this cake in half, Catherine.".
迪克年齡七歲，他的妹妹凱瑟琳五歲。一天，媽媽把他們帶到姨媽家去玩，自己就到大城市去買些新的衣服。
孩子們玩了個把小時，在四點半的時候，姨媽領(lǐng)著迪克走進了廚房。她交給迪克一塊精美的蛋糕和一把刀子，并對他說：“喏，迪克，給你刀子，把這塊蛋糕一切為二，給你妹妹一塊。不過，你得記住要做得像一個紳士那樣。”
迪克問：“像一個紳士?紳士怎樣做呢?”
他姨媽馬上回答說：“紳士總是把大的'一塊讓給別人的。”
迪克說了一聲“噢”。他對此想了一會，然后，他把蛋糕拿給妹妹，并對她說：“凱瑟琳，你來把這塊蛋糕一切為二吧。”
爆笑小學(xué)生英語笑話篇三：老師哭了
The six-year-old John was terribly spoiled. His father knew it, but his grandma doted on(溺愛，寵愛) him. He hardly left her side. And when he wanted anything, he either cried or threw a temper tantrum(亂發(fā)脾氣) . Then came his first day of school, his first day away from his grandmother's loving arms.
When he came home from school his grandma met him at the door. "Was school all right?" she asked, "Did you get along all right? Did you cry?"
"Cry?" John asked. "No, I didn't cry, but the teacher did!"
六歲的約翰嬌生慣養(yǎng)。他的父親知道這一點，可他的祖父母仍然寵著他。這孩子幾乎寸步不離他的.祖母。他想要什么不是哭，就是鬧。
他第一天上學(xué)才離開祖母的懷抱。約翰放學(xué)了，他奶奶在門口接他并問道：“學(xué)校怎么樣?你過的好嗎?哭了沒有?”
“哭?”約翰問，“不，我沒哭，可老師哭了。”
爆笑小學(xué)生英語笑話篇四：I've Just Bitten My Tongue
"Are we poisonous?" the young snake asked his mother.
"Yes, dear," she replied - "Why do you ask?"
"Cause I've just bitten my tongue! "
Notes:
(1) poisonous adj.有毒的
(2) Cause I've just bitten my tongue 因為我剛咬了自己的舌頭。 句中 Cause 是 Because 的縮略形式。
我剛咬破自己的舌頭
“我們有毒嗎?”一個年幼的'蛇問它的母親。
“是的，親愛的，”她回答說，“你問這個干什么?”
“因為我剛剛咬破自己的舌頭。”
爆笑小學(xué)生英語笑話篇五：更強壯的一個
Will and Bill were quarrelling about whose father was the stronger.
Will said, "Well, you know the Pacific Ocean ? My father's the one who dug the hole for it."
Bill wasn't impressed, "Well, that's nothing. You know the Dead Sea ? My father's the one who killed it!"
維爾和比爾在爭吵，誰的`爸爸是更強壯的一個。維爾說：“你知道太平洋嗎? 那個坑是我爸爸挖的。”
比爾不屑地說：“那沒什么。你知道死海嗎? 那是我爸爸打死的。”
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