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爆笑英語(yǔ)冷笑話6則
導(dǎo)語(yǔ)：人生在世，最重要的就是要快樂(lè)，快樂(lè)的源泉往往來(lái)源于生活，生活也充滿了無(wú)窮無(wú)盡的歡樂(lè)，諸如一個(gè)笑話也許就是你茶余飯后的消遣。小編特意為大家整理了爆笑英語(yǔ)冷笑話6則，大家開(kāi)心開(kāi)心。
爆笑英語(yǔ)冷笑話6則
1 Teacher: Find Australia on the map for me, Johnny.
Johnny: It's there, sir.
Teacher: That's right. Now Sammy, who discovered Australia?
Sammy: Johnny, sir.
老師: 約翰尼，在地圖上給我找出澳大利亞在什么地方。
約翰尼: 先生，在這兒。
老師: 對(duì)了。薩默，你來(lái)回答是誰(shuí)發(fā)現(xiàn)了澳大利亞?
薩默: 先生，是約翰尼。
2 Teacher: "John, what is the past participle of the verb to ring?"
John: "What do you think it is, sir?"
Teacher: "I don't think, I KNOW!"
John: "I don't think I know either, sir!"
老師：“John，動(dòng)詞ring的過(guò)去分詞是什么?”。
約翰：“你想它是什么呢”?
老師：“我不用想，我知道!”。
約翰：“我想我不知道”。
3 Teacher: Jack, why aren't you listening?
Jack: But, teacher, I'm listening.
Teacher: If you were listening, tell me what I said just now.
Jack: You said, "Jack, why aren't you listening?"
老師：杰克，你為什么不認(rèn)真聽(tīng)課?
杰克：老師，我正在聽(tīng)課呀!
老師：如果你剛才在聽(tīng)課，那告訴我剛才我說(shuō)的什么。
杰克：您說(shuō)的是：“杰克，你為什么不認(rèn)真聽(tīng)課?”
4 man goes to church and starts talking to God. He says: "God, what is a million dollars to you?" and God says: "A penny", then the man says: "God, what is a million years to you?" and God says: "a second", then the man says: "God, can I have a penny?" and God says "In a second."
一男子進(jìn)入教堂和上帝對(duì)話.他問(wèn):"主啊, 一百萬(wàn)美元對(duì)你意味著多少?"上帝回答:"一便士."男子又問(wèn):"那一百萬(wàn)年呢?"上帝說(shuō):"一秒鐘."最后男子請(qǐng)求道:"上帝,我能得到一便士嗎?"上帝回答:"過(guò)一秒鐘。”
5 Restroom Use:Entirely too much time is being spent in the restroom.There is now a strict 3 minute time limilt in the stalls.At the end of 3 minutes,an alarm will sound,the tollet paper roll will retract,the stall door will open and a picture will be taken.After your 2nd offense,your picture will be posted on the company bulletin board.
廁所使用規(guī)則：大家上廁所的時(shí)間太長(zhǎng)，現(xiàn)在規(guī)定一次只能去三分鐘。時(shí)間一到，廁紙會(huì)縮回，廁所門會(huì)打開(kāi)，你將被拍下來(lái)。如果第二次違反規(guī)定，照片將被貼到公司公告欄。
6 A poor man entered a doctor’s consulting-room. He looked very unhappy.
“Doctor,” he said, “you must help me. I swallowed a penny about a month ago.”
“Good heavens, man!” said the doctor. “Why have you waited so long? Why don’t you come to me on the day you swallowed it?”
“To tell you the truth, Doctor,” the poor man replied, “I didn’t need the money so badly then.”
一個(gè)窮人走進(jìn)診所。他滿臉憂愁。
“大夫。”他說(shuō)道：“您一定得幫幫我啊。大約在一個(gè)月前，我把一枚便士給吞進(jìn)肚子里去了。”
“天哪!伙計(jì)。”大夫說(shuō)道：“你怎么耽擱了這么久呢?你吞下它時(shí)怎么不來(lái)找我呢?”
窮人答道：“大夫，實(shí)話跟您說(shuō)吧。當(dāng)時(shí)我還并不急著用這錢呢!” 【爆笑英語(yǔ)冷笑話】相關(guān)文章： 冷人段子爆笑笑話01-05 冷段子經(jīng)典爆笑笑話大全04-27 爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話對(duì)話10-28 爆笑假期中的英語(yǔ)笑話06-02 經(jīng)典爆笑話04-19 笑話爆笑經(jīng)典10-07 英語(yǔ)小笑話爆笑帶翻譯11-23 笑話吧 爆笑笑話07-05 爆笑笑話 極品笑話06-25 爆笑冷笑話08-21