英語笑話笑話大全笑破你的肚子的雙語笑話
兩個男孩子在后院露營，不知道到了晚上幾點(diǎn)鐘。一個男說：“我們開始大聲唱歌就行了”。過了一會兒，一個鄰居打開窗戶喊道：“小聲點(diǎn)!你們不知道現(xiàn)在是凌晨三點(diǎn)嗎?”更多英語笑話盡在應(yīng)屆畢業(yè)生笑話網(wǎng)。
你爺爺
A well dressed young man demanded as soon as he entered the restaurant:"Serve me, quick! Give me your best. I don't care the price."Not like the way he talked, the waiter said to him: "Hey Buddy, it doesn't matter you have a lot of money. You are still son of somebody, and grandson of somebody else."The young man raged: "Dare you! Tell me, who wants me to be his grandson?"The waiter replied with ease: "Nobody. Just your grandfather."
一位衣冠楚楚的年青人一進(jìn)飯店就大聲嚷嚷：“喂，有什么好菜盡管端上來，錢多少我不在乎。”服務(wù)員聽了很不是滋味：“哥兒們，錢多頂個屁，你不照樣得做別人的兒子，就是有人要你做孫子你也不敢不做!”年青人勃然大怒：“誰敢占老子的便宜?你說，是誰不要命了，膽敢要老子做他的孫子?”服務(wù)員慢條斯理地答道：“你爺爺!”
現(xiàn)在幾點(diǎn)了
The two boys were camping in the backyard. When they couldn't figure out what time it was, the first boy said to the second, "Start singing very loud."
"How will that help?" said the second boy.
"Just do it," insisted the first.
Both boys broke into song, singing at the top of their lungs. Moments later, a neighbor threw open her window and shouted, "Keep it down! Don't you know it's three o'clock in the morning?"
兩個男孩子在后院露營，他們不知道到了晚上幾點(diǎn)鐘。于是，一個男孩對另外一個說：“我們開始大聲唱歌就行了。”
“那就會知道時間嗎?”第二個男孩問。
“只管唱吧。”第一個堅持道。
兩個孩子開始大聲唱歌，過了一會兒，一個鄰居打開窗戶喊道：“小聲點(diǎn)!你們不知道現(xiàn)在是凌晨三點(diǎn)嗎?”
她要買什么
A store manager heard a clerk tell a customer. No, ma’am, we haven't had any for a while, and it doesn't look as if we'll be getting soon.Horrified, the manager came runningover to the customer and said, Of course, we'll have somesoon, We placed an order last week. Then the manager drew the clerk aside: Never, never, never say we are out of anything say we've got it on order and it's coming.Now what was it she wanted? Rain, said the clerk.
一個商店經(jīng)理聽見一個店員對顧客說：不，夫人，這會兒沒有，一時半會兒看來也不會有。經(jīng)理驚恐萬分地跑到顧客跟前說：當(dāng)然，馬上就會有的`。我們上周訂了貨。然后經(jīng)理把店員拉到一邊：千萬，千萬，千萬不要說我們沒有什么，說我們已經(jīng)訂了貨，貨馬上就到�，F(xiàn)在你說她要買什么? 雨，店員說。
相同的職責(zé)
The Same DutiesA retired four-star general ran into his former orderly, also retired, in a Manhattan bar and spent the rest of the evening persuading him to come work for him as his valet. "Your duties will be exactly the same as they were in the army," the general said. "Nothing to it-you'll catch on again fast." Next morning promptly at eight o'clock, the ex-orderly entered the ex-general's bedroom, pulled open the drapes, gave the general a gentle shake, strode around the other side of the bed, spanked his employer's wife on her bottom and said, "OK, sweetheart, it's back to the village for you."
相同的職責(zé)一個退休的四星級將軍在曼哈頓的一個酒吧偶然地遇到了他以前的勤務(wù)兵，勤務(wù)兵也退休在家。這位將軍花了一整個晚上的時間來說服他回來做他的貼身隨從。“你的職責(zé)與在軍隊(duì)時完全一樣，”將軍說，“這沒什么，你很快就會再次理解它的。” 第二天早晨八點(diǎn)鐘時，前勤務(wù)兵迅速地進(jìn)到前將軍的臥室，拉開窗簾，輕輕地?fù)u了搖將軍，然后大步走到床的另一側(cè)，在他雇主的妻子屁股上拍了一下，說道：“好了，甜心，你該回到村莊去了。”
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