英語笑話大全笑破你的肚子的笑話帶翻譯
警察：有人搶你的手表時(shí)，你為什么不呼救呢?男子：要是我張口的話，他們就會(huì)發(fā)現(xiàn)我的四顆金牙，那就更糟了。想了解更多的帶翻譯英語笑話，請跟小編來應(yīng)屆畢業(yè)生笑話網(wǎng)吧。
沒想到那么貴
A shoplifter 51kxh.cn |was caught red-handed trying to steal a watch from a jewelry store. "Listen," said the shoplifter, "I know you don't want any trouble either. What do you say I just buy the watch, and we forget about this?" The manager agreed and wrote up the sales slip. The crook looked at the slip and said, "This is a little more than I intended to spend."
一個(gè)小偷在一家珠寶店企圖偷走一只手表的時(shí)候被當(dāng)場擒獲。“聽著，”小偷說，“我知道你們也不想惹麻煩。我把這只表買下，然后我們就當(dāng)什么也沒發(fā)生，你看怎樣?”經(jīng)理表示同意，然后列了一張售貨單。小偷看著單子說道：“這比我最初的預(yù)算稍稍高了一點(diǎn)，你們還有沒有便宜一點(diǎn)兒東西。”
為什么不呼救
Policeman: Why didn't you shout for help when you were robbed of your watch? Man: If I had opened my mouth, they'd have found my four gold teeth. That would be much worse.
警察：有人搶你的手表時(shí)，你為什么不呼救呢?男子：要是我張口的話，他們就會(huì)發(fā)現(xiàn)我的四顆金牙，那就更糟了。
他們都在這里
The warden of the prison felt sorry for one of his inmates because every weekend on Visitor’s Day, most of the prisoners had family members and friends coming, but poor George always sat alone in his cell. So one Visitor’s Day, the warden called George to his office and said, "I notice you’ve never had any visitors, George." Sympathetic, he put his hand on George’s shoulder. "Tell me, don’t you have any friends or family?" George replied, "Oh, sure I do, Warden. It’s just that they’re all in here!"
典獄長對獄中一位囚犯深感同情，因?yàn)槊糠曛苣┑奶皆L日，大多數(shù)囚犯都有家人或朋友來訪，但是可憐的'喬治總是孤伶伶地坐在自己的囚室中。因此在一個(gè)探訪日，典獄長把喬治叫到辦公室說：“喬治，我注意到從來沒有人來探望過你。”他滿懷同情地把手放在喬治的肩膀上：“告訴我，你沒有任何朋友或家人嗎?”喬治回答：“喔!當(dāng)然有，典獄長，只不過他們?nèi)荚谶@里面!”
狗娘養(yǎng)的
my father, who was 14 years old than my mother, had been working on his will. at a family dinner he told us that he had provided well for mother, but the family home would go to us five children if she remarried.我爸比我媽大14歲，最近一直在寫遺囑。一次家宴上，他告訴我們說他為母親以后的生活作好了安排，但如果她改嫁的話，家里的房子將歸我們五個(gè)孩子所有。"i don't want another s.o.b. toasting his shins around my fireplace," he explained.“我可不愿意另外哪個(gè)狗娘養(yǎng)的在我的火爐旁烤他的狗腿，”他解釋道。with a sly grin, mother
cracked, "what makes you think i'd marry another s.o.b?"媽媽狡猾地咧了咧嘴，譏誚道：“你怎么認(rèn)為我會(huì)再嫁給一個(gè)狗娘養(yǎng)的?”
沒把頭發(fā)全剪掉啊
Miles sometime went to the barber's during working hours to have his hair cut. But this was against the office rules: clerks had to have their hair cut in their own time. While Miles was at the barber's one day, the manager of the office came in by chance to have his own hair cut and sat just beside him."Hello, Miles," the manager said. "I see that you are having your hair cut in office time.""Yes, sir, I am," admitted Miles calmly. "You see, sir, it grows in office time.""Not all of it," said the manager at once. "Some of it grows in your own time.""Yes, sir, that's quite true." Answered Miles politely, "but I'm not having it all cut off."麥爾斯有時(shí)在上班時(shí)間去理發(fā)館理發(fā)，但這是違反辦公室規(guī)定的：職員只能利用自己的時(shí)間理發(fā)。一天，正當(dāng)麥爾斯理發(fā)時(shí)，經(jīng)理碰巧也進(jìn)來理發(fā)，而且就坐在他旁邊。“你好，麥爾斯，”經(jīng)理說。“我看到你在上班時(shí)間理發(fā)了。”“是的，先生。正是這樣。”麥爾斯平靜地承認(rèn)了。可先生，你看，頭發(fā)是在上班時(shí)間長的。“不全都是吧，”經(jīng)理立刻說，“有一些是在你自己的時(shí)間里長的。”“對呀，先生，你說得很對。”麥爾斯禮貌地回答說，“但我并沒有把頭發(fā)全都剪掉啊。”
誰是世界上第一個(gè)男人
A teacher said to her class:”Who was the first man?”“George Washington,”a little boy shouted promptly.
“How do you make out that George Washington was the first man?”asked the teacher，smiling indulgently.“Because,” said the little boy, “he was first in war, first in peace, and first in the hearts of his countrymen.”But at this point a larger boy held up his hand.“Well,”said the teacher to him, “who do you think was the first man?”
“I don’t know what his name was,”said the larger boy, “but I know it wasn’t George Washington, ma’am, because the history book says George Washington married a widow, so, of course, there must have been a man ahead of him.”
一個(gè)老師問她的學(xué)生：“誰是世界上第一個(gè)男人”一個(gè)小男孩立刻大聲說：“喬治.華盛頓。”老師帶著寵溺的笑容問這個(gè)男生：“你如何證明喬治華盛頓是世界上第一個(gè)男人呢。”這個(gè)男孩子說：“因?yàn)�，他是第一個(gè)挑起戰(zhàn)爭，第一個(gè)主張和平，并且是第一個(gè)深得民心的人。”這時(shí)，有一個(gè)年齡稍大的男孩子舉起手來，老師問他，“你認(rèn)為誰是世界第一個(gè)男人?”男孩回答說：“我不知道他的名字，但是我肯定他不是喬治華盛頓，因?yàn)闅v史書上說，喬治華盛頓和一個(gè)寡婦結(jié)婚了，所以在他之前，當(dāng)然還有一個(gè)男的啦。”
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