幽默英語笑話大全笑破你的肚子帶翻譯

　　Waiter, this lobster has only one claw. -- I'm sorry, sir. It must have been in a fight. -- Well, bring me the winner then.更多英語笑話盡在應屆畢業(yè)生笑話網。

　　我不敢想象

　　Guest: "Why does your dog sit there and watch me eat?" Hotel Host: "I can't imagine, unless it's because you have the plate he usually eats from." 客人：“為什么你的狗狗坐在那兒老是看著我吃東西呢?”旅館主人：“我不敢想象，除非是因為你拿了它經常用來吃東西的盤子了。”

　　我不能說是哪一年

　　Palmist: The life line in your hand tells that you will die in a year. Customer: Good gracious! In a year? Palmist: Yes, but I can't say in which.手相大師：你手上的生命線顯示出你還有一年將會死去。顧客：天哪，一年后?手相大師：是的，可是我不能說是哪一年。

　　給我那個打贏的

　　Waiter, this lobster has only one claw. -- I'm sorry, sir. It must have been in a fight. -- Well, bring me the winner then.服務員，這個龍蝦只有一只爪。對不起，先生，這只肯定打過架了。哦，那給我那個打贏的吧。

　　在電話本上

　　Boy: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?" girl: "It's in the phone book." Boy: "But I don't know your name." girl: "That's in the phone book too." 男：我想給你打電話。你的電話號碼是多少?女：在電話本上呢。男：可是我不知道你的'名字呀。女：也在電話本上呢。

　　粗心的教授

　　The absent-minded professor shouted: "Kate, come to the blackboard!" Another student says, "Kate is absent, Professor." "Silent! Let Kate speak for herself."粗心的教授大聲地喊道：“凱特，到黑板前面來!”另外一個學生說：“教授，凱特沒來。”“別出聲，讓凱特自己講。”

　　我可以存多少錢

　　Husband: Before I married you, I never thought of saving money.Wife: And now?Husband: Now I'm thinking About how much I could have saved if I hadn't married you.丈夫：在娶你進門之前，我從來沒有想過要存錢。妻子:那現(xiàn)在呢?丈夫：現(xiàn)在我在想，要是沒有娶你的話，我可以存多少錢。

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