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愚人節(jié)笑話英語笑話作文
愚人節(jié)你看過英語笑話嗎,要不要一起來看更多的英語笑話呀。
奇怪的關(guān)系
Four best friends met at the hospital since their wives were giving births to their babies. The nurse comes up to the first man and says, "Congratulations, you got twins." The man said "How strange, I'm the manager of Minnesota Twins." After awhile the nurse comes up to the second man and says, "Congratulations, you got triplets." Man was like "Hmmm, strange I worked as a director for the "3 musketeers." Finally, the nurse comes up to the third man and says "Congratulations, you got twins x2." Man is happy and says, "Ironic, I work for the hotel "4 Seasons." All three of them are happy until they see their last buddy jumping all over the place, cursing God and banging his head on the wall. They asked him what's wrong and he answered, "What's wrong? I work for 7up"!
四個(gè)好朋友在醫(yī)院里碰面了,他們的妻子正在生產(chǎn).護(hù)士過來對(duì)第一個(gè)男人說:"恭喜,你得了雙胞胎."男人說:"多奇怪呀,我是明尼蘇達(dá)雙子隊(duì)的經(jīng)理."過了一會(huì)兒,護(hù)士過來對(duì)第二個(gè)男人說:"恭喜,你得了三胞胎."男人很喜歡:"嗯,又巧了.我是3M公司的董事."最后,護(hù)士跑來對(duì)第三個(gè)男人說:"恭喜,你得了2對(duì)雙胞胎."男人很開心地說:"真令人啼笑皆非,我為四季賓館工作."他們?nèi)齻(gè)都很高興,但第四個(gè)伙伴急得像熱鍋上的螞蟻,咒罵上帝并用頭撞墻.他們問他有什么不對(duì)勁,他回答道:"什么不對(duì)勁?我可是在七喜公司工作呀!"
一分鐘一百萬
A man goes to church and starts talking to God. He says: "God, what is a million dollars to you?" and God says: "A penny", then the man says: "God, what is a million years to you?" and God says: "a second", then the man says: "God, can I have a penny?" and God says "In a second."
一男子進(jìn)入教堂和上帝對(duì)話.他問:"主啊, 一百萬美元對(duì)你意味著多少?"上帝回答:"一便士."男子又問:"那一百萬年呢?"上帝說:"一秒鐘."最后男子請(qǐng)求道:"上帝,我能得到一便士嗎?"上帝回答:"過一秒鐘."
媽媽在砸瓶子
A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup to come out of the bottle. During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her four-year-old daughter to answer the phone. The child said, "Mommy can't come to the phone right now. She's hitting the bottle."
一個(gè)婦人正在使勁打開番茄醬的瓶子。這時(shí),電話鈴響了,她叫四歲的女兒去接電話。小孩說:“媽媽現(xiàn)在不能接電話,她在砸瓶子。”
The Use of a Handsaw
At the mall, my wife and I picked up some hardware items, including a handsaw. We were heading back to the car when we passed a steakhouse.
Let's try it. " my wife suggested. Although I felt a little foolish carrying the saw, I followed her inside.
Scanning the menu, my wife told the waitress, " I' 11 have chopped sirloin, please.
The waitress turned to me, eyed my saw and commented, "And I see that. you, sir, have come for our T-bone special.
在集市上,我和妻子買了一些五金用品,包括一個(gè)手鋸。我們返回汽車時(shí)剛好路過一家牛排店。 “我們嘗嘗吧,”我妻子建議說。盡管我覺得拿著鋸有點(diǎn)傻乎乎的,但還是隨她走了進(jìn)去。 我妻子掃視了一下菜單對(duì)女招待說:“請(qǐng)給我來一份炒牛腰片。” 女招待轉(zhuǎn)向我,看了看我的鋸,說道:“我能看出,先生,你是來吃我們的T形骨特色菜的。”
The Nice Wedding Gift
We attended the wedding of an acquaintance's son. Because we did not know the young man or his bride, we decided to send them a practical household gift, a fire extinguisher. Apparently, the couple mass-produced their thank-you notes because we received a card saying: "Thank you very much for the nice wedding gift. We look forward to using it soon.
我們參加了一個(gè)熟人的兒子的婚禮。由于我們都不認(rèn)識(shí)那個(gè)年輕人和他的新娘,所以我們決定送給他們一個(gè)實(shí)用的全家禮----一個(gè)滅火器。很明顯,這對(duì)新人大批量制作了他們的感謝信,因?yàn)槲覀兪盏搅艘粡埧ㄆ,上面寫著?ldquo;非常感謝您的漂亮的結(jié)婚禮物,我們期待著不久就用到它。”
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