2015圣誕節(jié)英語小笑話集錦

　　The other two don’t exist!

　　另外兩者并不存在

　　On Christmas Eve Santa Claus met an honest politician and a kind lawyer while

　　riding up in an elevator of a very exclusive hotel. Just before the doors opened

　　the three of them noticed a 1000NT bill lying on the floor. Which one of them do

　　you think picked it up?

　　Answer: Santa of course! Why? Because everybody knows that the other two

　　don’t exist!

　　圣誕節(jié)前夕，圣誕老人和一清廉的政治人物，以及一心地善良的律師在一家高級飯店一同等電梯，門還未開前，三人同時看到地上有一張新臺幣1000元的鈔票，猜猜誰會將它撿起?

　　答案：當然是圣誕老人啦!為什么?因為大家都知道另外兩者并不存在。

　　The thief and the judge

　　法官與小偷

　　It was Christmas and the judge was in a benevolent mood as he questioned the prisoner. "What are you charged with?" he asked.

　　"Doing my christmas shopping early," replied the defendant.

　　"That's no offense," replied the judge, "How early were you doing this shopping?"

　　"Before the store opened," countered the prisoner.

　　那天是圣誕節(jié)，法官在審訊犯人時也有點惻隱之心。“你為什么而被起訴?”他問。

　　“采購圣誕節(jié)物品過早。”被告答。

　　“這不算犯法，”法官回答，“你購物多早?”

　　在商店開門之前，“犯人應道。

　　Jesus's Telly

　　耶穌的電視機

　　A child on Christmas time asked for some paper and crayons in order to draw a

　　crib. Eventually the artistic masterpiece was displayed for parental approval.

　　The manager, the shepherds, Jesus and Holy Family wore duly admired.

　　"But what's that in the corner?" asked Mother.

　　"Oh, that's their telly," replied the tot.

　　圣誕節(jié)時孩子要了紙和蠟筆，想畫一張耶穌誕生像。最后這件藝術品被陳列出來供父母鑒賞。

　　他們對耶穌誕生后睡的`馬槽，牧羊人，耶穌及其家庭都逐一表示贊賞。

　　“可是那個角落里是什么?”媽媽問。

　　“噢，那是他們的電視機，”孩子回答說。

　　What does Santa Claus like to do in his garden?

　　圣誕老人喜歡在花園里做什么?

　　What does Santa Claus like to do in his garden?

　　Answer: he likes to hoe, hoe, hoe

　　圣誕老人喜歡在花園里做什么?

　　答案：鋤地。(英文里Hoe 和ho同音。hoe是鋤草之意，ho則是圣誕老人的笑聲。)

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