初中的英語笑話大全

　　1、

　　The school of agriculture's dean of admissions was interviewing a prospective student. "Why have you chosen this career?" he asked.

　　"I dream of making a million dollars in farming, like my father," the student replied.

　　"Your father made a million dollars in farming?" echoed the impressed dean.

　　"No," replied the applicant. "But he always dreamed of it.

　　農(nóng)校的招生辦主任在面試一個上線的學生，“你為何要選擇這個職業(yè)?”他問。 “我夢想以經(jīng)營農(nóng)場來賺一百萬元，就像我父親一樣。”這個學生回答說。 “你父親經(jīng)營農(nóng)場賺了一百萬元?”主任驚詫地問道。

　　“沒有，”這位申請人回答道，“他總是夢想著賺到這個數(shù)目。”

　　2.

　　A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath, and stopped centimetres from a shop window.

　　The driver said, "Look mate, don't ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me!" The passenger apologized and said, "I didn't realize that a little tap would scare you so much. "The driver replied, "Sorry, it's not really your fault. Today is my first day as a cab driver. I've been driving a funeral van for the last 25 years."

　　乘客輕拍了一下出租車司機的肩膀,想問個問題. 司機大叫起來, 車也失去了控制, 幾乎撞上一輛公車, 還上了便道, 在還差幾厘米就撞上商店櫥窗時終于停了下來.

　　司機說,“伙計,別再這么干了. 你把我嚇破膽了!”乘客抱歉地說, “我沒想到拍你一下就嚇成這樣.” 司機說,“對不起,也不全是你的錯. 今天是我第一天開出租. 以前25年里我一直開殯葬車.”

　　Uncle Frank, at 79, was a healthy and wealthy man, a lifelong bachelor. He courted a lot, he said, but "never boiled over-just simmered." On a whim, he decided to take a trip around the country to look up nearly a dozen old girlfriends.

　　Upon his return he exclaimed, "Whew! Thank goodness I never married any of those women - They're all widows now!

　　弗蘭克叔叔七十八歲了，富有而健康。他是個終生單身漢。他曾追求過很多女孩，但“從不過熱----見好就收”。一天他突發(fā)奇想，決定四處走走，去看看他那些接近一打的舊時女友。

　　他回來即嘆道：“噓!謝天謝地幸虧我沒娶那些女人中的任何一個。如今她們都成寡婦了!”

　　3.

　　A boy cried to his mother, "All the children make fun of me. They say I have a big head."

　　"Don't listen to them," his mother said, "You have a beautiful head. Now stop crying and go to the store to buy twenty pounds of patotoes."

　　"Where is the shopping bag?"

　　"I haven't got one-use your hat."

　　一個小男孩向他母親哭訴道：“他們都取笑我，說我腦袋大。” “別聽他們的，”他母親安慰道，“你有一個很漂亮的腦袋。好啦，別哭了，去商店買十斤土豆來。”

　　“購物袋在哪兒?”

　　“沒購物袋了----就用你的帽子吧。”

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