每日爆笑英語笑話

　　1、An American attorney had just finished a guest lecture at a law school in Italy when an Italian lawyer approached him and asked. "Is it true that a person can fall down on a sidewalk in your country and then sue the landowners for lots of money?"

　　Told that it was true, the lawyer turned to his partners and started speaking rapidly in Italian. When they stopped, the American attorney asked if they wanted to go to America to practice law.

　　"No, no." one replied. "We want to go to America and fall down on sidewalks."

　　一位美國律師剛結(jié)束他在意大利一所法律學(xué)校的客座演講，就有一位意大利律師走近他問：“聽說在你們國家里，一個(gè)人跌倒在人行道上，他就會(huì)起訴這塊地的所有者賠償很多錢，這是真的嗎?”

　　得知這是真的后，意大利律師轉(zhuǎn)向他的同行開始用意大利語快速談?wù)撈饋怼．?dāng)他們停下來后，美國律師問他們是否想去美國做法律工作。

　　“不，不，”有一個(gè)人回答說，“我們要去美國跌倒在人行道上。”

　　2、Mrs. Brown dialed her daughter's number and sang out, "Hello, darling. How are you?"

　　"Terrible, Mom. My back is killing1 me, the children are acting2 up, the house is a mess…and I'm expecting guest for dinner."

　　"Don't worry, darling. I'm coming right over. I'll feed the kids, clean up your place, and cook a dinner your guests will never forget."

　　You're an angel! How is Dad?"

　　"Dad? Sweetheart, you know Daddy died nine years ago."

　　Pause. "What number are you calling? Hold on? Please!" the voice wailed3. "Does this mean you are not coming over?"

　　布朗夫人給她女兒撥了個(gè)電話，然后高興地說：”哎，親愛的，你好嗎?“

　　“太糟了， 媽媽。我的腰疼得很厲害。孩子們一直在鬧，房子里亂七八糟的，我還要為六為客人準(zhǔn)備晚餐。”

　　“親愛的，別著急，我馬上就來。我會(huì)把孩子們喂飽，清理好房子，然后給客人們做一頓難以忘懷的晚餐。“

　　“你真是個(gè)救命的菩薩，爸爸怎么樣?“

　　“你爸爸?親愛的，你這是怎么啦?你爸爸九年前就死了呀?”

　　沉默了一會(huì)，“您是不是撥錯(cuò)了電話?請(qǐng)別掛上，”那個(gè)聲音變的有氣無力了，“是不是這就意味著您不會(huì)來啦?”

　　3、There was a man who raised a pig. He felt tired of it and gave it up. However, the pig knew the way to go home. The man did not succeed in doing so several times.

　　One day, the man drove an vehicle, turning many times on the way, then gave it up. Late at night, he telephoned to his family and asked: "Had the pig returned home?"

　　A member of his family answered: "It had." The man roared1: "Let it answer the telephone. I am lost!"

　　某人養(yǎng)一豬，煩，棄之，然豬知?dú)w路，數(shù)棄無功。

　　一日，其駕車轉(zhuǎn)了很多彎尋豬，深夜致電家人，問：“豬歸否?”

　　答曰：“已歸!” 其怒吼：“讓它接電話，老子迷路了!

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