搞笑的英文笑話
搞笑的英文笑話一：
After being with her all evening, the man couldn't take another minute with his blind date.
和相親對(duì)象呆了一晚上后，男人再也受不了了。
Earlier, he had secretly arranged to have a friend call him to the phone so he would have an excuse to leave.
他事先安排了個(gè)朋友給他打電話，這樣他就能借故先離開了。
When he returned to the table, he lowered his eyes, put on a grim expression and said, "I have some bad news. My grandfather just died."
當(dāng)他回到桌邊，他垂下眼睛，裝出一副陰沉的表情，說(shuō)：“有個(gè)不幸的消息，我的祖父剛剛?cè)ナ懒恕?rdquo;
"Thank heavens," his date replied. "If yours hadn't, mine would have had to!"
“謝天謝地!”他的約會(huì)對(duì)象說(shuō)，“如果你的`祖父不死，我的祖父就得死了!”
搞笑的英文笑話二：
On a trip to Disney World in Florida, my husband and I adn our two children devoted ourselves wholeheartedly to the wonders of this attraction. After three exhausting days, we headed for home.
弗羅里達(dá)州的迪斯尼樂園是一個(gè)迷人的地方。一次我和丈夫以及兩個(gè)孩子前往旅游，我們?nèi)硇牡爻磷碓谒母鞣N奇觀之中。精疲力竭地玩了三天之后，我們要回家了。
As we drove away, our son waved and said, "Good-by, Mickey."
當(dāng)我們驅(qū)車離開時(shí)，兒子揮手說(shuō)："再見，美奇。"
Our daughter waved and said, "Good-by, Minnie."
女兒揮著手說(shuō)，"再見，美妮。"
My husband waved, rather weakly, and said, "Good-by, Money."
丈夫也有氣無(wú)力地?fù)]了揮手，說(shuō)道："再見，美元。"
搞笑的英文笑話三：
When my printer's type began to go faint, I called a repair shop where a friendly man told me that the printer probably needed only to be cleaned.
由于我的打印機(jī)不能打印出清晰的字來(lái)，我就打電話給維修部。電話是一位非常和藹的男人接的，他說(shuō)我的打印機(jī)也許只是需要清理一下。
Because the shop charged 50 pounds for such cleanings, he told me, it would be better for me to read the printer's directions and try the job myself.
他還說(shuō)，如果讓維修部清理的話要交50英鎊的清理費(fèi)，讓我最好看看使用手冊(cè)自己試著清理。
Pleasantly surprised by his words, I asked, "Does your boss know that you discourage business?"
當(dāng)時(shí)我真的被他的話感動(dòng)了，就問(wèn)他：“你們老板知道你這樣拒絕生意么?”
"Actually it's my boss's idea," the employee replied. "We usually make more money on repairs if we let people try to repair things themselves first."
“事實(shí)上，這就是我們老板的主意，”雇員答道：“因?yàn)槿绻覀冏層脩粝茸孕行蘩泶蛴C(jī)的話就能掙更多的錢。”
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