妻子與丈夫間的英語(yǔ)笑話

　　1.A man fell ill. His wife called a doctor in for him.

　　While the doctor was looking over the man, his wife kept fussing(煩躁，發(fā)牢騷) andjabbering(快而含糊地說) all the time. The doctor told her: "Your husband must get absolute rest and quiet." Then he left some sleeping pills.

　　The man's wife asked, "When do I dive them to my husband?" The doctor replied, "No, they are not for him. They are for you. You need them."

　　有個(gè)人生病了。他的妻子請(qǐng)了一位醫(yī)生來(lái)給他治病。

　　醫(yī)生在給他治療的時(shí)候，他的妻子一直大驚小怪，神神叨叨地緊張不安。醫(yī)生對(duì)她說：“你的丈夫必須絕對(duì)休息和保持安靜。” 然后他就留下了一些安眠藥。

　　她問醫(yī)生：“什么時(shí)候給我丈夫吃這些藥呀!”醫(yī)生回答說：“不用，這些藥不是給他吃的，是給你吃的，你需要。”

　　2.A woman had bought birthday presents for her husband.

　　She was so excited and anxious to tell him. She said, "I've bought two presents for your birthday, dear. I would tell you now because I can't wait until that day. One present is a mat to put in front of my dressing table. Another one is a bronze statuette(小雕像) for the drawing room mantelpiece." And then she added: "Now me?"

　　Her husband thought for a while and then replied: "I'd better get you a new razor and some ties, so that we may exchange presents with each other."

　　有個(gè)女人給她的丈夫買了生日禮物。

　　她很激動(dòng)，并且急于要告訴她的丈夫。她說：“親愛的，我買了兩樣?xùn)|西給你做生日禮物。我現(xiàn)在就要告訴你，因?yàn)槲业炔坏玫侥且惶觳耪f。一件禮物是一個(gè)地墊，可以放在我的梳妝臺(tái)前。另一件是一個(gè)青銅的小雕像，可以放在客廳的壁爐架上”她還說：“好啦，你準(zhǔn)備給我買什么呢?”

　　她的丈夫想了一會(huì)就說：“我最好是給你買一個(gè)刮胡刀和幾條領(lǐng)帶。這樣我們就可以互相交換禮物了。”

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