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英語幽默句子精選
I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
開始我直接求上帝賜輛自行車。后來我琢磨上帝辦事兒不是這個路數(shù)。于是老子偷了一輛然后求上帝寬恕。
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
你永遠(yuǎn)不能戰(zhàn)勝一個純SB,因為他會把你的智商拉到跟他個水平,然后用豐富的經(jīng)驗打敗你.
I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.
曾以為我想要的是職業(yè),結(jié)果發(fā)現(xiàn)我只是想要工資。
Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
直譯:知識就是說你知道西紅柿是一種水果;智慧就好似不要把它放進(jìn)水果沙拉里。
意譯a:知識就是告訴你說應(yīng)該把雞蛋放進(jìn)籃子,智慧則是叫你不要把所有雞蛋都放進(jìn)一個籃子。
意譯b:所謂知識就是知道韓少和小四都屬于80后,但智慧告訴你最終還是男女有別。
If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.
上帝瞅著咱們呢,大伙好歹喜感點吧!
Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.
孩子就是:你先花2年,教丫們走路和說話。然后你再花16年教丫們坐定和閉嘴。
Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says"If an emergency, notify:" I put "DOCTOR". What's my mother going to do?
當(dāng)我填表的時候,有一項是“緊急情況聯(lián)系:” 我填上了“醫(yī)生”,到時候我媽能幫上什么忙?!
The sole purpose of a child's middle name, is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.
直譯:小孩子要中間名,純粹是為了讓他知道他啥時候真的有麻煩了。
意譯:起個全名就為了揍孩子前可以底氣十足地喊出來。
It's not the fall that kills you; it's the sudden stop at the end.
跳樓的時候,“啊——”的時候還沒死, “啪!”那才是死了。
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