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雅思寫作范文和評(píng)分標(biāo)準(zhǔn)
通過(guò)學(xué)習(xí)雅思的高分作文，可以有效提高自己的寫作水平。下面小編為大家整理的是雅思的寫作范文以及評(píng)分標(biāo)準(zhǔn)，希望對(duì)大家有所幫助!
范文：
Every year several languages dieout. Some people think that this is not important because life will be easierif there are fewer languages in the world.
To what extent do you agree ordisagree with this opinion?
Withthe development of globalization, people around the world are becoming more andmore close. However, the influence of this change is still a source of constantdebate. Even though languages may be affected under this wave, globalisationhas its own advantages in some aspects.
Theobvious argument in its favour is that some languages are not important withthe rapid development of international communication. Especially for the younggeneration ,they think life will be easier if there are fewer languages in theworld. They can also get better understanding of their international issue which can help them to travelconveniently and enjoy the different landscape by themselves when they are inanother country.
Thereare ,however, some advantages in cultural globalization. Since every year severallanguages die out ,people should take more attention on it .They should protecttheir heritage because native language is a form part of their lives andsprits. They will feel connected with their customs and traditions .If alanguage is only spoken by a small number of people , it will become extinct.People in this circumstance must feel isolated and they may lose bettereducational opportunities and more entertainment choices. We are now living ina multicultural society where people are more open-minded and creative. Somepeople can speak two or more languages just for entertainment and build good relationships with different people since they have different languages andlifestyles.
In my opinion, language is essential for everyone which need us to protect theendangered languages. It is a historic source and we need diversity culture tomake our world colourful.
Total：(4+4+5+6)/4=4.75=5 分
評(píng)分標(biāo)準(zhǔn)：
Task response 4 分
1.the answer is tangential
雖然語(yǔ)言的消失和全球化有聯(lián)系，但是題目并未直接讓論證全球化對(duì)于世界語(yǔ)言數(shù)量的影響，題目的意思是語(yǔ)言數(shù)量越少，是否生活就會(huì)越便利。你的首段強(qiáng)行把全球化的影響植入到段落里面，導(dǎo)致你的首段最后一句，即表明立場(chǎng)的句子的重點(diǎn)放在了全球化是否對(duì)人們生活有利上了
2.present some ideas but these are difficult to identify
第二段劃線句子，世界上的語(yǔ)言越少，年輕人越容易了解了國(guó)際問(wèn)題就對(duì)于他們出國(guó)旅游有好處，能更好的欣賞風(fēng)景?這個(gè)點(diǎn)拼湊痕跡特別嚴(yán)重。了解國(guó)際問(wèn)題和欣賞風(fēng)景有什么關(guān)系?
第三段一整個(gè)段落完全找不到這個(gè)段落的中心思想，第一個(gè)點(diǎn)貌似是要保護(hù)文化遺產(chǎn)因?yàn)檎Z(yǔ)言是這些人的靈魂。但是題目說(shuō)的重點(diǎn)是語(yǔ)言消失而不是文化遺產(chǎn)的間接消失。第三個(gè)點(diǎn)說(shuō)我們是多文化社會(huì)，很多人都會(huì)好幾種語(yǔ)言，可能是為了娛樂(lè)或者是建立良好的關(guān)系，這個(gè)點(diǎn)到底在說(shuō)多文化讓我們的生活更方便還是多語(yǔ)言讓我們的生活更方便?我感覺(jué)你對(duì)題目所述的重點(diǎn)把握不清楚，只是把自己能想到的和題目話題即“語(yǔ)言消失”有關(guān)系的點(diǎn)全部寫進(jìn)去。
Coherence and cohesion 4分
presentinformation and ideas but there is no progression.
你雖然列舉出一些點(diǎn)。但是每一段缺乏中心思想，第三段邏輯極為混亂。完全看不出每個(gè)句子之間的聯(lián)系。最后一段最后一句并未很好的總結(jié)全文，不明白這句話到底是要表達(dá)什么意思。
詞匯 5分
整篇文章最有意思的地方是，如果不管文章寫的是什么，只看邏輯最亂的第三段。每一句話里面的用詞情況還是比較準(zhǔn)確的。而且單獨(dú)看這些句子完全能看懂是什么意思。那我在這個(gè)地方，只能假設(shè)第三段里面的句子全部是你自己寫的，所以總評(píng)詞匯5分。但是從考官的角度來(lái)看，如果能把單句寫的那么清楚，為什么整個(gè)段落和整篇文章會(huì)混亂成這個(gè)樣子，可能會(huì)懷疑你是背誦，那全文直接判四分了，不管你遣詞造句水平多高。
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