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備考分享:盤點托福寫作中的常見審題誤區(qū)
審題,是寫作的第一步,卻經(jīng)常被大家所忽略。有太多考生只著眼于如何寫出漂亮的句子和高級的詞匯,而沒有搞清寫作的本質(zhì)--考察學生針對某一話題進行準確連貫表述的能力。這也是為什么很多同學雖然英語不弱,在托福考試的獨立部分中卻只能拿到fair或good當中較低的4分。那么,到底怎樣才能更加容易地拿到獨立寫作的滿分呢?筆者今天將通過列舉以往考過的真題進行解析,告訴大家如何審題,換句話說,如何使高分變得更加achievable。
審題誤區(qū)NO.1 忽略關鍵詞
同學們考寫作考了這么多年,大多數(shù)出題的形式都已爛熟于心,看到題目之后覺得熟悉于是興沖沖提筆就寫,其實,這種看似"熟練"的表象下藏著巨大的隱患--同學們很有可能因為看得太快而忽略某個決定題目意思的關鍵詞。例如:
例1:
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Advertising is theonly main cause for people’s unhealthy eating habits.
看到這個題目,同學們立刻會開始想,有沒有other reasons for unhealthy habits,想出三條如:1. People’stight schedules do not allow them to eat at regular hours; 2. Sometimes peopleare eager to lose weight or to keep fit so that they go on "endless diets"; 3.Bearing heavy burden both physically and mentally, some consider eatingconstantly as their most effective stress reliever. 綜上所述,advertising is not theonly cause.
這個寫法看起來非常完備,但其實犯了一個不起眼卻嚴重的錯誤--題目不是要我們證明it is not the only cause,而是要我們?nèi)プC明itis not the only main cause。多一個"main",意思是很不一樣的。如果我們只需要證明it is not the onlycause,那么找出other causes即可即例1中的寫法。但是,如果我們要證明it is not the only maincause,就需要證明other causes that we mentioned are also maincauses,這就需要在每一段中加上一些專門的說明;蛘,更簡單的辦法是去證明advertising is not even a cause,直接在每段的末尾加上advertising與該段所論述的unhealthy eating habit無關的論述即可。If it is not a cause,how can it be the onlymain cause? 這樣一來,就不用通過證明還有其他maincause來反駁了,事實上,證明某種cause是maincause還是挺有難度的,因此筆者推薦同學們用后一種方式進行論述。因此,文章還是disagree,而三段的主題句分別應該是:1、1. People’stight schedules do not allow them to eat at regular hours, and it is obviousthat they are too busy to be influenced by advertising; 2. Sometimes people areeager to lose weight or to keep fit so that they go on "endless diets", and thisis more like a result of human nature, the pursuit of beauty, but notadvertising; 3. Bearing heavy burden both physically and mentally, some considereating constantly as their most effective stress reliever, and it is quite clearthat no advertising encourages them to do so.
例2:Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Colleges anduniversities should offer more preparation for student before they startworking.
看到這個題目,很多同學會可能會這樣寫:Agree. 1. Students should takemorespecializedcourses(專業(yè)課)in order to be knowledgeable and skillful enough fortheir future careers(接著開始論述being knowledgeable and skillful的重要性);2.Participating in internships helps students to have a clearer picture of theirvocational development in the future(接著開始論述,如果沒有實過習,在工作的時候是多么地feel souNPRepared); 3. Attending more club activities is an effective way to improvesocial skills, which are crucial for success both in life and at work(接著開始論述goodsocialskills對職業(yè)和生活的幫助).如果不看括號里的內(nèi)容,僅看主題句,這篇文章是沒有任何問題的。然而,括號中的論述從嚴格意義上來講,是不能支持"more"這個關鍵詞的。舉個簡單的例子:"我們需要錢"和"我們需要更多錢"在證明的時候重點是不一樣的。如果證明"我們需要錢",應該詳細
闡述錢的"不可或缺性",比如生活、學習、教育都需要錢;但是如果證明"我們需要更多錢",重點則應該放在"錢不夠"的論述上,證明在學習、生活、教育方面的預算都很緊張。同樣地,上面的題目中僅僅證明Knowledgefor careers, field experience and social skills areimportant是不夠的,事實上,這些根本不需要證明,需要證明的事情是graduates today are not well prepared in thethree aspects. 因此這篇文章應該是一篇"抱怨型"的文章,詳細地去論述學校工作的不足。參考思路如下:Agree. 1. Many studentstoday complain that they cannot learn practical skills and up-to-dateinformation, for some of their teachers are not qualified enough to teachspecialized courses; 2. Since many students are not allowed enough time toparticipate in internship programs before graduation, they know very littleabout what their future jobs like; 3. Joining clubs is possible for everycollege student, yet not every club provide is capable of offering enoughopportunities for students to practice their social skills.
同學們在寫文章的時候一定要注意,學術論文寫作不是句型和辭藻的堆砌,整篇文章一定是一個well-organizedsystem,這個system中很重要的原則之二就是--1、每個中間段的topic sentence是用來支持main idea的;2、topicsentence后面的每句話都是用來支持該topic sentence的。在上面的兩個例子中,大家會發(fā)現(xiàn)例1的錯誤主要是main idea沒有很好地被topicsentence支持;而例2的錯誤在于topic sentence雖然看起來是支持mainidea的,但是論述的內(nèi)容可能跟關鍵詞"more"無關,從而不能有力地支持topic sentences。這些錯誤的起因,則是對題干中關鍵詞的忽略。
審題誤區(qū)NO.2 誤解關鍵詞
與忽略關鍵詞的人不同,有些同學過于執(zhí)著于關鍵詞的字面意思,而沒能看出其背后的implication,從而被關鍵詞限制住思路,無法下筆。比起忽略關鍵詞,這種錯誤更常發(fā)生在細心且實力不錯的同學身上,也很值得大家注意。筆者建議,在寫文章的時候要靈活,不要拘泥于關鍵詞的字面意思,否則理由很不好想,就算想出來也很難用英文表達。例如:
例3:
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The governmentshould spend more money on elementary schooleducation than on universityeducation.
題目的意思是說,比起投資大學教育,政府應該在小學教育上投入更多的資金?吹竭@個題,同學們會有不同的看法,大體來講無非是兩種--認為universityeducation應該花更多的錢或反之。但是,大家很快會發(fā)現(xiàn)證明任何一種觀點都是不容易的。比如說,有些同學可能會這樣寫:Agree. 1. Elementaryschool education involves more students than university education and itrequires more money; 2. Colleges and universities have more sponsors thanelementary schools so that the government should offer more financial supportfor the latter.
3. Since elementary school education is the cornerstone of universityeducation, it deserves more money from the government.
上面的主題句看起來是沒有問題的,然而在展開的時候困難重重--第一個點里說Pupils的數(shù)量多所以花錢多,這的確是事實,可是pupil人均所需要的經(jīng)費卻肯定比universitystudents少,最關鍵的是,我們并沒有數(shù)據(jù)作為支撐;第二點里說校友或社會人士的支持使得大學在財政方便面比小學要寬裕的多,然而,這還是一個沒有數(shù)據(jù)就無法證明的觀點;第三點里說elementaryschool education是universityeducation的基礎所以前者就應當比后者得到更多的預算,這是一個典型的邏輯錯誤,因此在段落展開的時候?qū)掷щy。A是B的基礎并不意味著要為A花更多的錢?傊X本身就是一個可以量化的東西,如果真的以錢的多少來寫這道題,在沒有數(shù)據(jù)支持的情況下是很難成文的。許多同學之所以在寫的時候覺得自己的文章很牽強,就是因為把該文當成了論述題,而大家要知道,論述題都是要會給出數(shù)據(jù)讓我們來分析的。那么,在沒有數(shù)據(jù)的情況下,這種題目該怎么寫呢?找到money后面的implication很重要。其實,題目并不是要我們?nèi)ビ懻撃姆N教育應該花更多的錢,而是讓我們?nèi)Ρ葍煞N教育的重要性,自然地,更加重要的教育就應該花更多的錢。所以我們可以有以下論述:
(Main idea)I cannot agree that the government should spend more money onelementary school education than on university education, because they areequally important.
(Topic sentence) 1. Elementary school education prepares children forcollege education by teaching them how to learn and what they are supposed tolearn. 2. University education helps students to be ready for the competitivejob market by equip them with excellent knowledge for jobs and goodcommunication skills.
(Conclusion) Since elementary school education and university education areboth indispensableandirreplaceable parts of our lifelong education and theycomplete each other, it would be rigid tosay that anyone of them deserves moremoney than the other.
其實,審題僅僅是寫作考試的第一步,在這之后還有構思、尋找素材、語言表達等一系列步驟。在以后的文章中,筆者將會對這些內(nèi)容進行詳細的論述,告訴大家如何寫出符合滿分要求又achievable的文章。最后,附上筆者所作范文一篇(例2),供大家參考。
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Colleges anduniversities should offer more preparation for student before they startworking.
Colleges and universities are the very places where students preparethemselves for the competitive job market. They can take specialized courses,and they can participate in internships, and they can also attend clubactivities. Although universities and colleges have done much for students,there is still more they can do.
Many students today complain that their specialized courses cannot satisfytheir need for practical skills and knowledge for specific careers. Theenrollment of colleges and universities in my country has been increasedconsiderably over the past decades, but the quality and the quantity of teachersand professors are not improved that much. Many newly graduated students withoutany field experience joined faculties due to the lack of teachers, and studentsfind it hard to learn anything more than what their text books contain. Manystudents are disappointed by teachers who know nothing but reading books.Colleges and universities really should spend more money on hiring experiencedand qualified teachers to teach specialized courses, providing students withwhat they really desire.
Internships and club activities provide students with chances to practicetheir social skills, but internships are always too short and club activitiesare not always available to all students. My sister is now a junior inuniversity and she only had a two months’ internship during her summer vacation.She complained that since the internship was too short, the company did not takeit seriously and she was required to do nothing but buying coffee or orderingmeals on the phone and she seldom had chances to communicate with colleagues orclients. Club activities are only available to active students who attend"active clubs" like Student Union, and member of other clubs seldom haveopportunities to organized activities due to their shortage of money, resources,and even authorization. Universities and colleges should allow students moretime for internships and pay equal attention to all clubs instead of supportingthe Student Union only.
University students today are very lucky to have opportunities to increasetheir knowledge of their challenges in the future, but they are still not fullyprepared. Measures should be taken if colleges and universities aim to have themwell prepared for the fiercecompetition ahead.
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