雙語校園:畢業(yè)了我們的愛情何去何從
畢業(yè)在即,愛情受到考驗
又一個畢業(yè)季來臨,同學(xué)們在一番努力后,想必對未來也都有了打算:讀研的讀研,工作的工作。對于同窗好友來說,畢業(yè)就意味著分離;校園情侶們也面臨著情感危機(jī)(emotional crisis),忠于愛情,還是選擇面包,在現(xiàn)實面前他們需要做出抉擇。
每年這個時候正是考研分?jǐn)?shù)公布之時,許多戀情都因此經(jīng)受著打擊。對于戀人們而言,異地工作或?qū)W習(xí)可能會迫使他們做出艱難抉擇,最先面對的就是分不分手的問題。
When graduate school entrance exam scores are released every year at this time, many romantic relationships take a hit. Lovers considering different locales for work or study must make some tough choices – beginning with whether or not to break up。
22歲的方云霞是南昌某高校英語系的學(xué)生,當(dāng)?shù)弥约哼M(jìn)入北大第二輪面試時,她留下了高興的'眼淚。當(dāng)她還沉浸在嶄新校園生活的遐想之中時,男朋友打來的祝賀電話將她拉回到現(xiàn)實:她和男朋友的感情十分真摯,但他可能不會追隨她去北京。
The moment that Fang Yunxia, a 22-year-old English major from a university in Nanchang, learned that she had been awarded a second interview at Peking University, she shed tears of joy. While she was imagining new life on her future campus, a congratulations call from her boyfriend pulled her back to reality: She was in a committed relationship with someone who is unlikely to follow her to Beijing。
于是她給他發(fā)了一條信息,聊聊幾個字:“我們需要談?wù)劇?rdquo;
So she sent him a message that read, simply: “We need to talk。”
盡管沒有立刻分手,但他們清楚這段兩年的戀情已經(jīng)走到了盡頭。方云霞說:“我們?nèi)匀粫娒,但是一切都變了。我們不再談(wù)撐磥恚皇且宦暵晣@息。”
Although the two did not break up right away, they knew their two-year relationship had come to an end. “We are still seeing each other, but things have changed. We don’t talk about the future,” said Fang. “And we sigh a lot。”
堅持或放棄
Hang in there - or not
太原的校園情感咨詢師苑瑞吟表示,那些面臨異地戀情困擾的學(xué)生應(yīng)當(dāng)更加堅定不移,信奉真愛。
According to Yuan Ruiyin, a Taiyuan-based campus relationship consultant, students facing the possibility of a long-distance relationship should show more perseverance and commitment。
苑瑞吟說:“如果戀人要去異地生活且他們之間感情真摯,那么另一半應(yīng)該追隨著他(她)。面臨困難就輕言放棄,這是不成熟的做法。”
“If one is going to live in another place, the other should go with him or her if the relationship is serious,” said Yuan. “To give up when thinking of a coming difficulty is immature。”
但苑瑞吟也特意提到,如果一個人突然變了心,那么很有可能這段感情無法渡過危機(jī)。
Yuan does note, however, that if one person suddenly has a change of heart it’s likely the relationship will never survive a crisis。
21歲的楊牟就讀于武漢科技大學(xué)管理專業(yè),考研時,他和女朋友報考了同一所學(xué)校。但結(jié)果是殘酷的:女朋友考上了,而他自己卻沒有。
Yang Mou, a 21-year-old management major at Wuhan University of Science and Technology, applied for the same Shanghai graduate school as his girlfriend. But the results were cruel: She got in; he didn’t。
盡管這六個多月的時間里,他們在同一間教室里上自習(xí);盡管這段最艱難的日子里,他們戀情也與日俱增,但當(dāng)?shù)弥@一消息時,他們之間的情感開始崩塌。楊牟意識到自己的女朋友變了。他們吵架時,她決不讓步。他表示她說話時姿態(tài)高傲,并開始對他說:“我認(rèn)為我理應(yīng)過得好一點。”
Although they spent more than six months studying together in the same classroom and grew their relationship during “the most difficult of times”, their ties began to fall apart with the news. Yang noticed that his girlfriend was changing. When they argued, she refused to back down. He says she talked in a cocky manner and began telling him, “I think I deserve better。”
最近,她向他表示自己已準(zhǔn)備好展開人生的新篇章。楊牟說:“我很傷心,一個考試怎么會改變這么多事情?”他還表示,他女朋友內(nèi)心認(rèn)為自己是成功者,而他是個“失敗者”。
Recently, she told him she was ready for a new chapter in her life. “I was hurt,” said Yang. “How can one exam change so much?” In his girlfriend’s eyes, Yang says, she is the successful one and he’s a “loser”。
追隨真心
Follow your heart
來自河南大學(xué)學(xué)生處的劉強(qiáng)(音譯)表示,對于所有戀人來說,學(xué)業(yè)或工作上的轉(zhuǎn)變都會對他們的情感構(gòu)成很大的威脅。
Liu Qiang, of the Henan University student affairs office, says that a change in career or study can be a major threat to any relationship。
劉強(qiáng)說:“當(dāng)一方向往新世界時,如果另一半心有旁騖,那么矛盾就會產(chǎn)生。這是一個普遍存在的問題,尤其當(dāng)這段感情還未成熟的時候。”
“When one partner is looking toward a new horizon, there will be conflict if the other puts their attention elsewhere,” says Liu. “This is a common problem – especially when the relationship is not mature。”
楊牟說,對于女朋友對自己所做的一切,他無法釋懷。但劉強(qiáng)卻表示,楊牟應(yīng)該對前女友寬容一些。
Yang says he cannot forgive his girlfriend for what she has done to him, but, according to Liu, he should go a little easier on his ex。
劉強(qiáng)說:“畢業(yè)過程是艱難的;一些人可能會稍有私心,但這也并非十惡不赦。”另外,他也奉勸學(xué)生情侶們要切記:“愛情并不是一道算術(shù)題;有時追隨直覺,你會得到正確答案的。”
“Graduation can be hard – it’s not a sin for someone to think about him or herself a bit more,” says Liu. He recommends that all student couples to bear one thing in mind: “Love is never a matter of calculation; sometimes following your instincts will lead you to the right answer。”
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